When the AC came on

I live in a condo
a big box of concrete
and glass
in the sky

Every year, summer’s begin
there’s the time
in-between
when the heat is off
and the AC too

too hot

Yesterday I stood
in the kitchen
alone
felt finally the coolness overtake me
with relief

then realization
there was no sound
realization

10 years to the day
He’d thrown himself from our balcony
34th floor
I found his note in the bedroom
“Julia, there’s nothing for me
in this world
anymore

i’m sorry”

I stood
in the kitchen
alone
and heard his scream
behind the glass of the door
to the world outside
and our potted plants on concrete

the coolness passed
but my chill’s remained
today the AC came on
already my coldness

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